This website is a crime against the internet and humanity.
The content is so useless it couldn’t even help itself.
The writing feels like it was generated by a malfunctioning toaster.
This website looks like a toddler smeared ketchup on a broken calculator and called it art.
The content smells like it was scraped from the bottom of a trash can.
The designer’s idea of modern is stuck in 1998.
This website is a train wreck with no survivors.
This site is so slow it could be outrun by a three-legged turtle.
The designer’s talent is a myth, like Bigfoot or good Wi-Fi.
The content is as fresh as a moldy loaf of bread.